All of the words said out loud for S02E26 of Audio Drama Debut, my podcast showcasing new audio drama, fiction and RPG trailers.
F/X - Footsteps echo around an empty hall.
THE LIBRARIAN (from a distance, within the same hall): Hello there! Sorry, I've not managed to get the microphone working, so you'll have to come closer. Feel free to take a seat anywhere. Grab one of the complementary goodie bags on the way past. There's a cream bun in every one! So, I might suggest you take one from the top.
Welcome to my very first Audio Drama Day event, here in the Excel Centre, London! I don't know why September the 5th is Audio Drama Day, but it seemed like an excellent thing to time my first convention with.
There are three halls, filled with events to do with dramas, books, stories, actual plays and a few other things. I suggest you take a look at the timetable in the goodie bag to decide what you want to attend.
This is the panel room, in which there will be held great conversations between people working in the audio drama field. Shortly, we'll be holding our first panel, the "does podcasting have to be so lonely?" discussion, with the CEO of the Audio Drama Day events company, the creator of the "The Very Good Librarian" podcast, and in a bit of a coup, the Acquisitions Librarian at the Library of Audio Fiction.
And then to your right is the live show hall, which has some amazing performances of popular podcasts throughout the day, by the cast of those shows. Why not take a look now?
F/X - Footsteps echoing through the hall, with some frantic running in the background.
THE LIBRARIAN (AS TIMMY): Great scott Mr. Librarian! If you hadn't known the Dewey Decimal system backwards, we've never have stopped the Robo-spiders from taking over the world!
THE LIBRARIAN (AS THE VERY GOOD LIBRARIAN): That's right Timmy. You must always remember - the only way to ever get anything done is strict organisation and following all the rules, even the ones that don't make sense.
THE LIBRARIAN: And scene! Thank you every...you, I hope you enjoyed this snippet of "The Robo-spiders, oh no, the Robo-spiders", episode 17 of my podcast "The Very Good Librarian".
And if you want more of that show, later we'll be doing a live show of the episode where the Librarian has his brain stolen, the episode where the Librarian has to stop a child doing evil drawings, and the episode where the Librarian has to seduce a giant. A personal favourite.
But there's a little break now, so feel free to explore one of the other rooms, such as the meet and greet next door.
F/X - Footsteps echoing through the hall, with some frantic running in the background.
F/X - Door opening.
Hello!
F/X - Door opening.
Good morning.
F/X - Door opening.
Nice to meet you!
F/X - Door opening.
UNSUSPECTING VISITOR: Please, please, he won't let me leave, please, let me leave!
F/X - Door opening.
DORIS THE POST WITCH (EXCITED): Post!
THE LIBRARIAN: No, not that one.
F/X - Door closing.
DORIS THE POST WITCH (SAD): Post.
F/X - Door opening.
THE LIBRARIAN: And you're back here in the trailer hall. Luckily, you're just in time for the scheduled slot playing new trailers, so take a seat and I'll run through the four.
First, Ketosis. After his wife's death, Don Madison decides to get in shape. Follow him and his pal Scooter on a wild weight loss journey to get ripped, jacked...and score chicks.
[CLIP - Ketosis]
The LIBRARIAN: Then, God of Obsidian, a dark fairy tale about a gaslighting relationship, as one woman desperately seeks the story that will take her back across the narrow, dangerous bridge to freedom.
[CLIP - God of Obsidian]
The LIBRARIAN: And The Living Fears. Forrest County Sheriff’s Deputy Maggie Burroughs is having a bad day. First there was the cold, wet winter weather, then a car accident on an icy bridge, and finally a routine stop to investigate a claim of neglected children. At an ages-old abandoned house in the middle of nowhere she finds a little girl and boy, and ends up dealing with far more than she ever expected.
[CLIP - The Living Fears]
The LIBRARIAN: And finally Who is Cam Candor? The most prolific fiction podcaster of all time disappeared without a trace in December, 2020. Investigative journalist B.K. Will looks into the mystery of Cam Candor in a gripping documentary.
[CLIP - Who is Cam Candor?]
The LIBRARIAN: Right, that's your lot for this week. I don't think I can do this event more than once without corporate sponsorship - I didn't realise quite how expensive big empty rooms could be, so perhaps best see me back in the Library next time.
And if you want to share any photos of your day, please send them to our twitter account, @AudioDramaDebut, and we'll share them.
Anyway, cheerio!
F/X - Door opening.
UNSUSPECTING VISITOR: Please, I don't want another hour in the ballpit...please!