All of the words said out loud for S03E02 of Audio Drama Debut, my podcast showcasing new audio drama, fiction and RPG trailers.
F/X - Fountain pen writing, and then being capped.
Hello there! Come in, come in, it's your lucky day. Not only have I just restocked the eclairs, I've just finished preparing the very first of our new Library of Audio Fiction membership cards, and if you want, you can have the first one. It's part of our new membership excellence system, or MES.
It will allow you to borrow all of our dramas, books, stories, actual plays and a few other things, and it also comes with a complimentary Fox's Glacier mint.
Here, let me just... oh damn, looks like they've all melted, sorry, maybe next time.
But anyway, the membership card, isn't it pretty? What a delightful grey colour. I'm not entirely sure what it's made of, but the chap who sold me the material said something about it being as tough as rhino skin, and as hard to get hold of.
It wasn't cheap though, I had to trade him a show about someone having their headphones stolen, a show about a cyber-criminal, and a show about art theft. Not technically mine to trade away, but I'm sure it's a worthwhile sacrifice. I think I backed them up somewhere.
That does mean there's a cost for this, but don't worry, I can just add that straight on your late fees.
And coming back to the membership card, all I have to do is stamp it...
F/X - The clicking of a stamp.
And there we go, 00000001. I think that's probably a bit special, you might want to hold onto it very carefully. Could be worth something in a few years. And I really must remember to click the stamp over before I do the next ones, to make sure no-one else gets a number one. They might think they have to pay more for it...yeah.
And now that you've got it, do you want to break it in by using it to listen to some trailers?
If you just swipe it here...
F/X - Sad beep.
Huh, try it again.
F/X - Sad beep.
Turn it around?
F/X - Sad beep.
Weird. Alright, well just scan your old one for now and we'll get you some trailers.
F/X - Happy beep.
First, Cascadia. 10 years after a cataclysmic earthquake and tsunami devastates the Pacific Northwest, a new ocean floor reveals itself along the infamous Cascadia Subduction Zone. When philanthropic billionaire, Wesley Badger falls unfit to go on a deep sea expedition to explore the new area, rookie captain, Declan Walters must step up and pilot The Alexandria Submarine through the uncharted Pacific abyss.
Fellow crewmembers are reluctant to trust their new captain, especially after a routine dive does not go according to plan... As the crew adventure into unknown waters, discoveries will be made and hearts will be broken in an underwater odyssey that will leave you breathless and blindsided. From beginning to surface.
[CLIP - Cascadia]
Then, Argon. Detective Patrick Dale and Police Chief Olivia Shepherd investigate the strange and unusual in the dangerous future metropolis of New Toska. Surrounded by an unrelenting ice storm that pummels the globe, the inhabitants of New Toska depend on an amazing scientific advancement to keep them safe. But while Dale and Shepherd confront bizarre new adversaries, hidden forces are working to undermine them and the safety of the city.
[CLIP - Argon]
And this week's RPG, The Prophecy Tango, a DnD 5e actual play podcast set in Eberron, featuring high-level play, swashbuckling action, pulp horror, and exotic adventures.
[CLIP - The Prophecy Tango]
And finally, Majoring In Her. A comedy about a young Black woman in college, trying her hardest not to get lost in her man and actually succeed at being a friend, daughter, and heck, a student. And this all takes place in 2007.
[CLIP - Majoring In Her]
F/X - A suspicious amount of stamping.
What? Oh.
F/X - Equally suspicious paper shuffling.
Right, that's your lot for this week. Feel free to tell people about our new membership card via our twitter account, it's @AudioDramaDebut, and you can find out about the newest shows at audiofiction.co.uk.
Anyway, cheerio!